New 'Museum of Retirement' Exhibit Receives 40,000 Applications For 'Man In Chair' Position

CLEVELAND, OH — Curators for the new "Museum of Retirement" have received over 40,000 applications from workers willing to spend their remaining years behind glass. The job description says the unpaid position includes lunch, lodging, and six uninterrupted hours with a newspaper.

The exhibit recreates a period when someone could stop working without immediately missing a rent or mortgage payment. Exhibit visitors will receive headsets explaining concepts unfamiliar to Americans today, including pensions, weekday hobbies, and even owning the chair.

The museum reports initial interest in learning about the concept of a 'retired American' is off the charts.

“We initially asked 'man in the chair' applicants to draw on personal leisure experience, but that severely limited the pool...” said curator Salma Sinclair. “Most guys needed a demonstration of how to sit down without checking whether they were on camera or if a supervisor was coming.”

Applicant Travis Watson, 64, submitted an audition tape in which he opened the sports section, briefly panicked, and asked what else he should be doing at the moment to supplement his family's income.

Watson currently holds two jobs and believes a role as an accessioned object could be an opportunity to quit one of them. He also said he's ready to sign the museum waiver allowing visitors to repeatedly tap the glass.

The museum clarified that the occupant would surrender most of his privacy, eat historically accurate Swanson TV dinners or tuna sandwiches, and occasionally be wheeled into a storage area during private events.

Hiring staff reveal that they have struggled to distinguish candidates who are genuinely interested in public education from those attracted to the position solely because it may allow them to remain indoors after age 70.

At press time, one applicant had been added to a short list after recounting the detailed story of his grandfather's 1990s retirement, portraying him standing beside a paid-off boat and house.